Would everyone please take a moment to remember, in grave silence, the month of January, unfairly branded the most depressing of the year. We will miss you, old chap, as you’ve given us many unforgettable memories of hopelessness and despair; of pain and regret; of procrastination and denial. Yeah, I don’t see the problem some people have with you. I have spent the past three days sobbing over your departure.
But now that’s all over with. Allow me to briefly update you, my adoring fans that number well into the millions, on how the construction work is going on my website. Soon, I will be sort of merging it with this. Yes, I know you all fear change, but it makes a lot more sense than some of the other stuff I’ve done, and it will encourage me to write reviews every time I log on, rather than just spout rubbish. Who knows, it may even encourage a couple of you to do the unthinkable and read a review every once in a while. One can only hope.
Don’t worry, I won’t be completely doing away with this blog. I’ll just use it for something infinitely more productive, like weekly updates and links to everything I’m working on. In other words, it will become what I intended it to be originally.
I have another reason for the reorganisation. Some of you may recall the little, tiny, yet nonetheless bright idea that I had a while ago, of publishing my own magazine. Considering the time and money I have available to me at this moment, it appears unrealistic and naive to expect a hard copy to materialize in the next few months…. See where I’m going with this? An online version will not only be more manageable but also easier to circulate (seeing as the online community is a lot more vibrant and enthusiastic than the grouchy unwilling-to-part-with-their-money 200,000 men and women of Portsmouth). Plus, I don’t particularly fancy going into direct competition with Empire, Total Film, and….Pugwash quite yet.
Apart from this groundbreaker, the situation doesn’t change. I’ll still need contributors for writing, research and design purposes. I’m even open to the odd touch of advertising. So I will be in touch with some of you, or if you’re feeling particularly kind-hearted, brave, some would even say foolhardy, and wish to whore yourself out to me of your own free will, then by all means offer your services independently, and it will be greatly appreciated. Even if you ‘don’t write’, I’ll find something else for you to do. Promise.
Look at me: I almost ended the post on a positive note there. What is the world coming to? Maybe it’s a false dawn, but February hasn’t started that badly….then again the first nine days of January weren’t too bad either and look how that one turned out. Still, at least compared to last month, this one really can’t be any more depre- wait a minute, isn’t that Valentine’s Day coming up?